Fernanda (phonemonkey) wrote in evil_trepannys,
Fernanda
phonemonkey
evil_trepannys

A nice story from Wide Lawns

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This right here, this is what parents should be doing---not telling little girls they're pretty or that it's important to be pretty---no, it should be this:
For my whole life, my mother always remembered to tell me that I was smart. Everyday she would tell me how smart I was. She told me that because I was smart that there were infinite possibilities for my life, though she did not tell me what the possibilities were. Those were for me to discover on my own, and listing them would limit them. No one ever did this for my mother. No one ever told her how smart she was or how pretty she was. It shocked me to learn that no one had ever brought up the possibility of my mother going to college. It was simply inconceivable to think that a poor, redneck girl would ever attend University classes. She believed then that only really smart, really wealthy people went on to higher education.

(Come to think of it, that goes for boys, too. It wasn't until high school I figured out I wasn't stupid. My world changed drastically once people I trusted starting telling me I wasn't. I am so angry that SW's mom never had someone tell her how bright she was when she young and had all the time in the world to do something with that awareness.)
POD.

It wasn't until after college that I was finally able to get away from those apparently bent on keeping me from managing to do anything with my life.
I don't think I had it anywhere near as rough as you in that department, though---I remember your stories about your family on E-Hell having quite a few doozies in the lack of support department.
In some ways, I think I had it easier as a result - it was consistent, so expected even if frustrating.

I'll never understand how parents could either be the ones to actively discourage and put down their own kids, or simply allow that to happen.
Just one of the cruel vicissitudes of life, I fear.
PODDY POD POD
I love the mother!
Widelawns rules - SW is a really good writer. I read her entire backlog. That was a good post - her mom sounds like an awesome lady.

The one about the Shrimp Prince was sad though!
The one about the Shrimp Prince was sad though!
Terribly sad - and sadly, I've seen similar...
That was awesome! I love her writing style, and she developed the story beautifully. I'm going to send a link on to family members who I know would be interested.
Oh, I loved that story too! It's good to see SW realizing her inner greatness, isn't it?